Posted in Caretaker, Elderly, Hospice, incontinence, Sickness, Widow

Time for a Change

I don’t usually need an alarm to wake up, but last night I stayed up way too late, and when my alarm went off at 6:55 am, I groaned, “Ugh, I don’t want to do this!” Hearing myself say that really caught me off guard. I know that’s a strange thing to say – how do you catch yourself “off guard,” but I can’t think of any other way to explain it. I used to love early mornings. Now, I get up, wash my face, and try to get one cup of tea in before I have to go in and change my mother-in-law. It’s really not that big of a deal…. we’ve been doing this for so long that it only takes a few minutes to change her nightie, her incontinence underwear, and the bed pad, but I can think of better ways to start my day.

This morning as I was fastening the snaps on Mom’s nightie, she said, “I bet you never thought, in your wildest dreams, that you would be changing your mother-in-law like a little baby.”

I wasn’t sure how to respond. I couldn’t think of anything to say that wouldn’t embarrass her. “Well…..” I said, awkwardly. Then I saw a cloth sticking to the inside of her gown, and I pulled it out exclaiming, “There it is! I’ve been missing this cloth!” We both laughed, and that was all we needed to change the subject.

No, not in my wildest dreams did I think I would be changing this woman’s diapers, but actually our relationship has never been better. We both just treat it as matter-of-fact, and we find something else to talk about or laugh at.

I have 3 daughters and one daughter-in-law. Will one of them be changing me some day. I’ve joked with them that they should “shoot me” first if it ever comes to that. They don’t appreciate it when I say it, and I really shouldn’t because I’m making it sound like having to be a caregiver is a terrible thing. Sure, I wish I could start my days in a different way, and I wish I had more time to myself, but my husband and I are doing what we can to give his mom the best end-of-life we can. I know our children would do the same for us.

Posted in Caretaker, Elderly, Marriage, Recipes, Sickness, Widow

Recipes for Pressure Cooker

Recipes for Pressure Cooker

These recipes are for beginner cooks, and may come in handy for a young adult who has just moved out or the older adult who suddenly finds that his/her spouse can’t cook anymore.  The amounts can be adjusted according to taste. I tried to keep everything simple here, and this is just to get started. The pot I use is the “Farberware 7-in-1 Pressure Cooker”. I have also tried them in the “InstaPot” though I’m not as familiar with the settings on that pot. If something just doesn’t work for you, please let me know about it.

4 Favorite Simple Recipes

  • Chicken and Vegetables
  • Navy Bean with Bacon Soup
  • Beef Stew
  • Pork Chops with Mashed Potatoes and Green Beans

Ingredients to have on hand:

  •         Canned Tomatoes (14.5 oz cans of fire roasted or regular)
  •         Chicken Broth and Beef Broth (get cans or 32 oz cartons of low-sodium. Most recipes call for about 2 cups, so you’ll have some leftover. Date the carton and put in fridge. Use within 1 week)
  •         Cream of Mushroom Soup – one can
  •         Can of Evaporated Milk
  •         Onion Soup Mix
  •         Navy Beans – 1 bag of dried beans
  •         Bacon
  •         Beef Stew Meat (1-2 pounds)
  •         Chicken Breasts – fresh, not frozen (it seems to make a difference)
  •         Pork Chops – boneless
  •         Potatoes – (bag of medium red potatoes)
  •         Carrots – fresh bunch or “baby carrots”
  •         Green Beans (whole, fresh or whole, frozen)
  •         Celery – 1 bunch
  •         Onions (2 -3 small to medium brown onions)
  •         Garlic – fresh
  •         Prepared Mashed Potatoes (Hormel has nice tubs of prepared potatoes – usually in the deli section.)

Seasonings:

  •         Garlic Powder
  •         Smoked Paprika
  •         Onion Powder
  •         Maybe an Italian Seasoning or some other blend that looks good to you

Recipe for Beef Stew

  •         2 Tbsp. Olive Oil
  •         Beef Stew Meat (approx. 1 lb.)
  •         4 potatoes peeled and quartered, unless they are red potatoes, then don’t peel.
  •         Carrots – peeled and cut into 1 inch pieces unless they are baby carrots – leave whole
  •         Celery – 1 or 2 stalks, cut according to taste
  •         Onion – 1/2 quartered or diced
  •         1 cup of Green Beans (whole fresh or frozen)
  •         1 package of Onion Soup Mix
  •         1/4 cup of flour
  •         Salt and Pepper (approx. 1 tsp. each)
  •         1 tsp. Italian Seasoning
  •         1 tsp. garlic powder
  •         2 Cups Beef Broth
  •         2 Cups Water

Heat oil in pot.

Put flour and salt and pepper into a ziplock bag and shake to mix. Add the beef, shake to coat. Add meat and onions to pot and brown (approx. 5 mins.)

Keep meat in pot and add all vegetables. Sprinkle onion soup mix on everything and stir. Stir in beef broth and water.

Cover and lock lid. Set Menu to Stew setting (02). The default time on that is 35 minutes. You might want to let it sit for a while to release the steam naturally, or just release it yourself!

Enjoy!

Pork Chops

This recipe works for 2 to 6 pork chops                                                                                            Brown meat, sliced onion and 1 cup of sliced mushrooms (optional) in 2 tablespoons olive or vegetable oil

Mix together 1 can of mushroom soup and 1 cup of beef broth or can of condensed milk. Add 1 tsp. garlic powder and pepper.

Pour soup over pork chops and use “Meat” setting on pot.

Serve with mashed potatoes and vegetable

Chicken and Vegetables

2 – 4 half breasts                                                                                                                                               2 cups chicken broth                                                                                                                                         Potatoes (quartered)                                                                                                                                   Carrots (cut into bite sized pieces)                                                                                                    Green beans (fresh or frozen)                                                                                                         Smoked Paprika                                                                                                                                      Pepper                                                                                                                                                    Sprinkle paprika and pepper on both sides of chicken and brown chicken in 2 tablespoons of olive oil (3 mins per side)                                                                                                                     Pile vegetables on top of chicken

Pour chicken broth over all                                                                                                                Season with 1 tsp. of Italian seasoning

Use “Soup” setting

Navy Bean Soup

½ package of bacon or 1 ham hock

1 package navy beans

2 carrots chopped

32 oz. of vegetable or chicken broth

1 can of diced tomatoes (I like “fire-roasted” or “Italian seasoned”)

Thyme – fresh or 1 tsp. powder

4 cups water

If you use bacon, cut it into bite-sized pieces. I use kitchen shears – it’s easier. Cook bacon on highest setting. If using a ham hock, you don’t need to brown it first. Just throw it in with all the other ingredients and turn the pot on “bean” setting.

Posted in Caretaker, Elderly, Hospice, Marriage, Sickness, Widow

Totally helpless

Yesterday marked 7 years since my father-in-law died. Seven years that we’ve been taking care of Mom. Usually, on December 22nd, we’ll sit with Mom and talk about Dad, then take her to the cemetery for a visit. Yesterday was very different though because Mark and I were desperately ill with the stomach flu. It all started on Sunday when the whole family was together for Baby Bea’s baptism and one of the little ones threw up. I was sure it was just from excitement, but by Thursday morning, all 4 of our children, their 3 spouses and 2 of the 3 little ones were either weak from, or right in the midst of, this terrible virus. We texted Dave to see if he could cover meals for Mom, only to find out that he was sick too. Three other people that I could usually call on in an emergency (2 friends from church and a neighbor) were all dealing with the same flu in their families.

In my stupor, all I could think of was “Visiting Angels” and with the help of Siri, I got someone on the phone. The woman I spoke with was very nice, and she really seemed to empathize with our plight, but she never called me back, after promising to do so. I know that we were asking a HUGE amount – to send someone over to a home dripping with Norovirus just days before Christmas, but if they couldn’t help us, they should have told us. I am now on a mission to find some local care-taking agencies and interview them before the next emergency happens.

How did we make it through that fateful day? Good question. At the appointed time, I got out of my sick bed, donned gloves and mask and hobbled 2 doors down to Mom’s house. I made her cream of wheat, tea and fruit, delivered it to her room, put “OnGuard” in the diffuser and told her the best way to show our love for her was to stay away from her. At dinner time I went through the same routine.

It was a terrible day to leave Mom all alone, but she understood. Next time we’ll be better prepared!